Love, Hate Relationship

Mac, I love you. I love how smooth you move and how lively you are when you first wake up in the morning. I love how fast you download anything, its so nice to have you in my life! I trust you, even when I click on sites that are filled with bullshit, you hang in there, strong and powerful.
But..
I always have to pay for your shit! You look amazing! You don't need that 7.3.45.114 UPDATE! I just want to be able to run your programs, babe! Don't make me pay for a new update every month, sweetheart, I have enough to worry about! And, you know when I was working on a video the other day and I realized that it had no split option? So, I tried to update and you gave me such a hard time...you want the update, but you turn it into an argument every time! Its what you want, but you can't justify it.
There are so many things I want us to do together, but when you shut down in the middle of our project and corrupt the files...I just...I want to hurt you. You know thats not like me, I love you. I just can't deal with your shit, my emotions can't take your mood swings and constant updates.
I'd like to work things out...
Don't look at me like that.
We've been friends for so long, I can't let you go.
Just work with me.
Say something!!

...Ok, nope...I'm done!

BYE!!